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05 October 2011 @ 12:31 am
Noblesse fanfic: That we might have roses in December  
Title: That we might have roses in December
Author: Miles
Fandom: Noblesse
Paring: onesided Yuna/M-21
Words: 369
Rating: PG
Summary: It is only because of our problems that we are able to grow. Yuna and her memories, as they come like dreams.

Yuna remembers things sometimes, little nightmare visions trickling into her mind, all the fear she's never been able to know, all the hope and happiness she was always shielded from.

It's not a complete picture. There are so many things she doesn't know, that she will never know, and the fragments make an ill defined scene. She is tempted to brush it off as fantasy, stress from the light limits of her days, but she thinks, just maybe, that this is the truth. She sees the rigid line of the adults' backs, the harsh blood in her friends eyes, the scar on her body that will never quite heal and wants to believe. She closes her eyes and as she dreams, she remembers.

She remembers the monsters and the blood and the darkness— remembers the way the cold cement seeped through her skirt— remembers that the way her body shook had nothing to do with the cold— remembers the moment she knew she would die— remembers— remembers—

She remembers closing her eyes.

This is the thing she will never understand: how he could keep getting up, how she, how any of them, could be worth it, how he could smile even then when she was so sure she never would.

And perhaps she is afraid at all these memories, terrified even, but those are the feelings of her past self and for all that pain she has gained something. Even if her mind forgets, even if one day she believes it all to be just a dream, she will still remember in her heart.

She thinks this is what it means to grow up.

“A-Ajusshi.' she says to him at the gate, the sun still hiding behind tall buildings and small hearts. There is a stutter to her voice, because what words can ever be enough, because nothing she can do will be deserving all that life, because he is young in the morning and she is in love.

'Ajusshi.' Yuna says, clear and bell like, almost as if recalling some courage from a half forgotten time, 'Thank you.'

And, for now, that will have to be enough.

(or maybe it was all in her mind after all.)
lucathia: fishbones: ringlucathia_rykatu on October 8th, 2011 07:37 am (UTC)
Really loved this! All the feelings and impressions Yuna remembers...
Miles Cain: Natsume paperlifelink on October 8th, 2011 09:47 am (UTC)
Thank you! I'm very glad you liked it~
Christy: noblesse -- shinwoo & seirarinhail on October 8th, 2011 09:34 am (UTC)
Very nice.
Miles Cain: Rin burninglifelink on October 8th, 2011 09:48 am (UTC)
Minako: Frankensteinminako85 on October 15th, 2011 07:40 pm (UTC)
I liked it a lot! Good work! ;)
Miles Cain: Magica bottleslifelink on October 16th, 2011 07:21 am (UTC)
Thank you! I'm very glad you think so :]